Coping with Rejection

by Jerry Senn

In his book Confidence, How To Succeed at Being Yourself, Alan Loy McGinnis speaks practically and wisely about roadblocks to being a success with people. His advice from a psychological perspective is helpful.

Dr McGinnis offers several helpful ways to cope with rejection.

First, “Expect rejection. We may be caught off guard” when someone turns on us or criticizes us…It hits us harder than it should.” We should remember that “anyone who attempts anything significant in life is going to stumble—often…. It does not necessarily mean that there is anything wrong with you.”

Second, “Consider the possibility that what you take to be rejection may not be rejection at all. It is very sad to look back on opportunities for relationships and to realize that for want of going out on a limb, we lost the chance to give and receive love. Don’t ever give up with good reasons.

Third, “Recognize that some people reject everyone.” For some, rejecting others has become simply a desire for self-protection or self promotion; they’re afraid to affirm anything or anyone.

Fourthly, “Try to learn from the rejection.” You may be doing some things that cause others, without knowing it, to reject you or refuse to accept you. So evaluate the situation and change your approach or your attitude. We may not be as careful as we need to be about the way we’re communicating, verbally or nonverbally.

These suggestions come from a well known psychologist who spends time daily counseling people with practical problems which stand in the way of being as successful as they would like.

However, most every interpersonal problem can be made better if we simply follow the advice of our Lord, when he said,

“So whatever you wish others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” 
—Matthew 6:12 

It’s called, “The Golden Rule” for good reasons!!!